The (False) Gospel of Singleness


I am kind of betwixt on all the talk about celibacy and abstinence among Christians. One the one hand, I get it. I really do. I know that the Bible teaches to flee sexual sin. That we must do. On the other hand, we're generally aiming the message at people who are in the most sexually-charged, hormone-flooded, biological clock ticking years of their lives.

When you add to the discussion that many of the same people will go on and on about "19 Reasons to Leave Him" and "The 7 Red Flags of a Relationship" it looks like we are simultaneously preaching the gospel of singleness and frustrating our very natures - to pair up and to procreate. How is it that all our "experts" have to say is "Girrrrrrl, stay single!" and at the same time "Girrrrrlllll, you betta not be having sex!" while pages on the calendar continue to turn.

Quite simply, it all seems askew to me. Shouldn't we shift the dialogue towards more of HOW to be in relationships? Hear what I'm saying. I am not arguing that everybody needs to find a No-Tell Motel and start screwing. I'm saying we probably need to SHORTEN the amount of time we stay single. Most of the best couples with the longest marriages are the ones who just met and pulled the trigger anyway. We're spending a lot of energy working against nature.

Bottom line: we spend too much time single. It's time to start encouraging people to marry again.